Aslan is on the Move!

Dirty snow. I've seen about enough of it to last the rest of my life. Dirty sidwalks, dirty streets, bare trees, brown, soggy, trampled grass, and enough mud to build the Pyramids with...

But the good news is, Aslan is on the move! He will be here soon, and everything His paws touch will turn green. Flowers will burst forth out of the waiting ground. Warm breezes and gentle rains will carry away the dirt and grime and cold. The scent of flowers and new life will permeate the air. I can't wait. My heart is longing for Him.

Because I can't help it

"Herr Capellmeister, I should like to compose something; how shall I begin?" asked a youth of twelve who played with great skill on the piano.

"Pooh, Pooh," replied Mozart, "you must wait."

"But you began when you were younger than I am," said the boy.

"Yes, so I did," said the great composer, "but I never asked anything about it. When one has the spirit of a composer, he writes because he can't help it."

-"Pushing to the Front" by Orison S. Marden Published in 1911

(This was posted on Crowbar Massage on December 26, 2003. I've thought about it so much since I first read it that I knew I had to capture it and repost it here for easy access.)

*****

This story says so much to my heart. When I read a book, may it be because it's captured my heart so fully, I simply must read it and cannot put it down. When I sing a song, may it be because the song is filling my heart to overflowing so much that if I didn't sing it, I'd suffocate. When I spend time with my husband, children, family and friends, may my attention and passion be so fully engrossed, that all else ceases to exist. When I pray, may it be because God is planting His own vision and will so permanently in my heart, that crying it out loud back to Him is the only comprehensible response.

A Dream Come True

When the first Lord of the Rings movie came out (The Fellowship of the Ring) I badly wanted to see it in the theater, on the big screen. But I also badly wanted to finish reading the book trilogy first. Since it took me three months to finish the books, I missed seeing the first movie in the theater. I did get to see it on DVD, though, and I loved it all the more for having finished the books. I knew I would, because knowing and having an affection for the characters, and a general understanding of the plot, always helps me enjoy movies more fully and enhances the entire experience greatly.

Since we have a giant movie collection, and watching movies is primarily what we do together as a family for relaxing recreation, we finally decided to invest in a big screen TV about 2 1/2 years ago. And ever since then, it's been a dream of mine to watch all of the Lord of the Rings movies in one day, from beginning to end.

The dream had kind of fallen on the back burner for the last year or so because of the overwhelming busy-ness of my life, until recently when I decided to start going back and reading the very first posts of several of my favorite blogs. I came across several posts with the texts from some of my favorite scenes from the movies, and my appetite to watch the movies was suddenly back and in full force.

Yesterday, it finally happened... After we got home from church and had a bite of lunch, we started watching the first movie at about 1 p.m. Because there are several young children in the house, there were, of course, multiple interruptions. The last movie finished at about 1 a.m. (And what and incredible finish it was!)

Those 12 hours were some of the most refreshing, exhilerating, invigorating, inspiring hours of my life! There are so many scenes from the whole trilogy that make my heart feel like it's about to explode out of my chest. The scene in this picture is one of my favorite scenes, not just from this series, but of all time. When Aragorn gently closes Frodo's fingers over the One Ring and swears to protect Frodo with his own life, I can hardly bear the sweetness of it. This scene calls to deep places in my heart and spirit that I don't even have access to, at least not yet.

I believe it was God's will for us to watch those movies yesterday, partly because my husband's work phone didn't ring a single time. I can't remember the last time that happened on a Sunday. Also, it was quite remarkable that we all agreed together that this was something we wanted to do. After all, 12 hours is an awfully long time to sit. It's utterly incredible how God works everything together in perfect timing and harmony, like a diverse and complicated orchestral number. He knows just when and how to motivate people to do what He would have them do, according to His perfect will and plan, and all of the tiny details that need to fall into place to accomplish that.

Last night as we were watching Frodo and Sam struggle to cross the harsh wastelands of Mordor, I realized I'm facing the same kind of battle in my own life. It's something I've been putting off for far too long, because I've been so afraid of it. But with God's help, I believe the time has come to bite the bullet, to jump into the deep end, and to embrace the changes that will be necessary to conquer the Orcs and Uruk-hai in my life.

With that end in mind, I've copied Pastor Eric's idea and have started another blog--a health and fitness journey journal. May God use it as He has used all of the other trusted blogs He's placed in my life - to motivate, challenge, strengthen and equip.

Breaking Out of the "Rudy" Mentality

I've never thought about this before, until after a conversation I had with someone at work a week or two ago. One of the departments at my work is going through a training class aimed at figuring out what each person is good at and what they most enjoy doing, and finding ways to let them express those giftings naturally in their work environment. After all, people are far more efficient and a lot more satisfied when they're doing something they're good at and that they enjoy.

Many times we don't ever realize our full potential, and part of the reason is because America is under a "Rudy" mentality. Think about the movie "Rudy" for a second... Here's this guy, a short, light-weight guy, who dreams of playing football for a certain college team. He's not built for football, football is not what he was created to do, and yet he continues to pursue this dream, all the while ignoring his other talents and letting the fullness of his potential lay untapped.

I admit, I've seen the movie, and liked it. But once I started thinking about this, I realized how silly the whole idea of that movie, and the story behind it, really was. As the person who was telling me about this said, "Yeah, it's a shining example, all right... A shining example of horrendous waste."

I began to meditate on the difference between "Rudy" and my favorite movie of all time, "August Rush." If "Rudy" is a shining example of wasted potential, then "August Rush" is a glorious testament to the beauty of potential realized. When, with the help of the Holy Spirit, a person finds what they were created to do, and when they embrace it passionately with their whole heart, they will be much further along on the road to rich joy and fulfillment in this life.

Irresistable

For the last several months, every time I've heard the song, "O Sacred Head Now Wounded," I've been irresistably drawn to it. Several times I've said to my mother, "I need to memorize the words to this song, it's a dire necessity!" But when I looked up the words, I discovered there were 11 verses, and, frankly, I was intimidated. But the song still called to me, like a Siren's song, and finally I realized that the appeal of all of the other songs I've been wanting to memorize had been lost.

So I've been dedicating the last week or two to committing these precious words to the depths of my heart, and God has been using them to minister to me in profound ways. I won't post the lyrics here, because, frankly, lyrics without music seem to be dead for most people. But if you ever want me to sing them to you, let me know... I'd be more than happy to. :)

The Underappreciated Value of Blogs

Blogs are kind of like playlists… When a person finds the playlist of a person who has the same musical tastebuds as themselves, they can trust that they will enjoy nearly every song on that playlist. What a blessing to find something like that! The work has already been done, the playlist has already been compiled, all you have to do is sit back and enjoy being able to listen to a bunch of favorites from one simple source.

Blogs are the same way. When you find the blog of someone with the same spiritual tastebuds as yourself, it's like finding a concentrated source of spiritual nutrition. What a blessing to know people who can be searching through books and websites and going to classes and having ideas that you'll never have on your own, or have the opportunity to go through on your own. And that they can inexpensively and convenientely share those precious gems of truth... Well, it's a modern-day miracle, and no less.

There are about 5 blogs that are in that realm for me.... Every time I visit them, I come away feeling blessed, or challenged, or convicted--but every single time, I feel 100% that it was by Divine grace and providence that I was allowed the privilege of the visit. There is a noble purpose and high calling in it. May God grant that I be faithful with everything He has trusted to me, including these precious opportunities.

When You're Green, You Grow

“When you’re green, you grow. When you’re not, you rot.”

My Internet friend, Danielle, who owns the blog “Danielle’s Realm,” shared this quote with me. It’s simple, short, catchy, easy to remember, and full of volumes of truth.

"I am the vine; you are the branches. If a man remains in me and I in him, he will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing.” Jesus Christ, in John 15:5

I sat in a church pew for years, hearing the messages and going through the motions, but not really growing. Not really changing. Not really being renewed deeply, from the inside out. But I thought it was okay. I was going to church. I was doing my part. The rest was up to the pastor and the teachers, and if I wasn’t growing, it was their fault.

Then God grabbed hold of my heart and told me that getting to know Him – really know Him – should be the most passionate pursuit of my life. That all of life, every moment of every day, is an opportunity to learn more about Him, and that church wasn’t just a place to learn more about Him—it’s a place to put into practice everything He’s been teaching me during the moments of my life when I’m not in church.

Things like learning how to love and accept people, including myself, unconditionally. Learning how to love, appreciate and enjoy being around all kinds of people, even the EGR (extra-grace-required) ones. Learning how to live and love fiercely and fearlessly, as the Spirit of God captures more of my heart, mind, energy, affections and trust.

How many people are rotting on their couches in front of the TV, or in their chairs in front of the computer, or i the pews of churches where they attend merely to punch a timecard, as it were? How heartbreaking it is, when God is right there, eagerly waiting to fill and cleanse all of our lives with streams – no, geysers! – of Living Water. Pure. Fresh. Exhilarating. Thirst-quenching.
I pray that we will all be hungrier and thirstier for more of Him, and will have open minds and hearts that hear and respond to His still, small voice—wherever it comes from.

Who is this God?

To answer that question, let’s look first at how God defines Himself:

“And he passed in front of Moses, proclaiming, "The LORD, the LORD, the compassionate and gracious God, slow to anger, abounding in love and faithfulness, maintaining love to thousands, and forgiving wickedness, rebellion and sin. Yet he does not leave the guilty unpunished; he punishes the children and their children for the sin of the fathers to the third and fourth generation." Exodus 34: 6, 7

This is the passage of scripture that is most quoted by (or repeated in) scripture. That tells me it’s worth paying close attention to. We should closely examine our concept of God to see if who we think God is lines up with who God says He is.

And then it’s helpful to look at who others say He is. Those who dwell closest to Him in the throne room of Heaven, the mighty angels, who see Him much more clearly and truthfully than we do, declare this:

"Holy, holy, holy is the LORD Almighty; the whole earth is full of his glory." – Isaiah 6:3b

It seems to me we like to think of the attributes of God’s character that most benefit us. But I pray that we would have a far deeper love for and appreciation of God’s holiness. I borrowed the following snippet from “The Souls of Men":

“Holiness is the glory of all the Divine perfections… Holiness is the distinctive glory of the Godhead: as Howe termed it, “an attribute of attributes, casting lustre upon the others.” As God’s power is the strength of His perfections, so His holiness is the beauty of them: as all would be weak without almightiness to back them, so all would be uncomely without holiness to adorn them.”

And here’s another statement about God’s holiness from Jonathan Edwards that God has used to truly change my life, from the inside out:

“It is most evident by the Works of God, that his understanding and power are infinite. . . . Being thus infinite in understanding and power, he must also be perfectly holy; for unholiness always argues some defect, some blindness. Where there is no darkness or delusion, there can be no unholiness. . . . God being infinite in power and knowledge, he must be self-sufficient and all-sufficient; therefore it is impossible that he should be under any temptation to do any thing amiss; for he can have no end in doing it. . . . So God is essentially holy, and nothing is more impossible than that God should do amiss.”

This is my God, the God I love, the God I serve, the God Who fills my life with joy and purpose. I’m enjoying getting to know Him more, every day, and am filled with anticipation because I realize that this… This is just the beginning.

Tools in the Hands of a Living God

Why is it that we tend to objectify "things"? We label things as evil, when it is the heart of man that is wicked.

When I was growing up as a Baptist, everything was considered evil. Movies. Decks of Cards. Make-up. Certain ways of speaking. Certain ways of dressing. Alcohol. Cigarettes. Just things, inanimate objects with no real moral value at all. And rules, rules, and more rules. But hardly any love, and what there was of love was a vain, hypocritical, self-seeking love, for the most part. At least, that's how it seemed to me, and that's how it seemed to my dad, who stopped going to church when I was quite young.

These days I know people who label the internet as evil. Because it is used for evil purposes. But I say that the internet itself is not evil! It's just a tool, just like anything else. If evil is promoted or accomplished on the Internet, it's because the heart of man is evil, and the internet is merely serving as a magnifying glass to show everyone around it the evil hearts of the people who use it for that reason.

Alcohol is the same way. The Bible referrs to "new wine," not in negative terms, but in positive ones. Jesus's first miracle involved wine. He said that people called Him a drunkard because He drank wine.

Prohibition and the Temperance Movement happened because people labeled alcohol as wicked, when instead, it was their own hearts that needed (and still need) cleansing. Alcohol has been present from almost the very beginning. It's been a major part of celebration and mourning, and even of healing, for mellenia.

When my husband has had a drink or two, he becomes the most sensitive of men. I've come into the room only to find his cheeks soaked with tears that were inspired because of a song he was listening to. Normally he's a very get-to-the-point, let's-get-it-done, driven, ambitious sort of person. But after a drink or two, he becomes sensitive, warm, and funny. He lets go of the mountains of cares that life has placed on his shoulders, and begins, just for a moment, to enjoy the small pleasures of life--free and unfettered.

God is good. Everything He created has a good purpose and a holy use. May we learn to balance and accept what He has given us with gratitude and humility, and to allow Him to truly rule lovingly in our lives, in every single detail. All glory to Your name, Dear Lord!

A Tale of a Man and his Wife

People-pleasing, peace-keeping (not to be confused with the much higher and holy calling of peace-making) "B-type" people like me sometimes have a hard time with more controlling "A-type" personalities. Not that I have a hard time getting along with them, because I'm usually able to get along with anyone. But I do struggle with having hard feelings and animosity towards them quite frequently, which presents certain challenges, especially since I'm married to one.

My entire married life I've wanted to be a good godly submitted Christian wife, so much so that I made up a mental list of what the actions of a submitted wife would look like, and spent a great deal of time and energy schooling my actions and non-verbal communication to make it look like I was that person. And yet, I've struggled with respecting my husband and submitting to his authority with my whole heart. I'm good at faking it, though, so many times it looks like I'm submitting to him and respecting him, when in my heart I'm rebelling with the worst kind of rebellion.

It all kind of came to a head when my mom moved here in November. Keith was concerned, I think, that when she came, I would consistently choose her over him. I tried to reassure him, and myself, that he was and would be and would remain my first priority after she moved here. However, the day before she was scheduled to arrive, he and I got into a heated e-mail argument.

In my writing, I attacked him with viciousness, cruelty, criticism, and harsh judgment. Repeatedly. And what's worse, I thought God was on my side. I felt like my anger was righteous anger. But when I hit "send" on the final round of e-sparring, God instantly opened my eyes to see the ugliness and horror of what I had done.

All these years my husband has said he doesn't really believe that he's my first human priority, and that I care more about other people and more about what they think than I do about him or about what he thinks. And all these years I've heatedly denied it, holding up and pointing to my list of self-made evidences to the contrary.

As soon as I hit the send button on that last email, God opened the eyes of my heart to finally truly see that Keith has been right all these years--he hasn't truly been my first priority, not on the inside, where it matters most. I was immediately ashamed of myself, to the core of my being.
I wrote him another email, within minutes of the last nasty one I'd sent him, asking him to please, please forgive me, and praying the God would give him the grace to do so. And I determined then and there to start taking steps to change my heart towards my husband. I felt comforted and encouraged by that determination and hopeful that things would truly begin to change for the better, from the inside out.

Little did I know...

A true test of my new conviction came the next night when my mom called to say she was nearly to Spokane. God had graciously provided someone for her to ride with, who was also able to tow her car behind them, and she was calling to say she wanted me to meet her at the downtown 3rd Avenue U-Haul where they were going to return the dolly they'd used to tow her car here.

Keith was on the phone working, and Stephen was playing video games, so I loaded up Becca and Michael into the truck and was just pulling out when Keith came out into the garage and asked what I was doing. I explained it to him, and he told me I should call her back and have her jump on the freeway after unloading the dolley, and meet me on Argonne instead of me going all the way downtown.

I knew she wouldn't like that at all, but I was trying to be the submitted wife, and to put my husband first, so I called her and asked her to do that. She sounded panicky and literally ordered me to get into the truck right now and come get her. My heart was torn in two. Keith was telling me quietly in the background to tell her that he was having a busy night with work, and to explain to her why he wanted us to do it that way. But instead of doing that, I simply told her that Keith was dead set against me coming downtown and that I couldn't do it.

After we hung up, I could see that Keith was extremely upset. He said that I had made him sound like an awful person, and that mom and the person driving her were both going to think badly of him because of what I had said and the way I had said it. He also said that whenever he talks to other people about me, he never does so in a way that would make me look bad to them. He always finds ways to say whatever needs to be said in the most honoring and dignified way possible, whereas when I talk to people about him, I do so to make myself look innocent and him look like the bad guy.

What could I say to that? He was completely and utterly correct, to my eternal, gut-wrenching shame.

I was extremely disheartened, discouraged and disgusted with myself (not to mention stressed out.) Here, just the day before, I had vowed to myself that I would put Keith first and honor him from the inside out. And here I was, proving to Keith and myself and everyone else that I was incapable of doing it.

But God used the situation to add more layers to the revelation from the day before. He showed me that only He will ever be able to change my innermost heart to make Keith my first human priority. I can't do it on my own, no matter how much I want to. But when it does happen, all of the glory will go to God alone. Hallelujah!

He also showed me that disrespecting Keith in my heart is something that I learned to do as a child, when I disrespected my dad (the male authority figure in the house and in the family at that time) in the same way.

I had secretly held them both in disdain. I secretly considered myself better, wiser, smarter, more spiritual, more valuable than them. All the while pretending to honor and respect them with my outward actions and non-verbal communication, even though my heart was full of corruption and pride and selfishness. Dear Lord, have mercy.

I didn’t know what to do or where to go from there… I felt absolutely paralyzed. A prayer something like, “Dear God, forgive me. Humble my heart. Have mercy on me. Show me what to say and do,” kept reverberating through my heart.

The person who had driven my mom up to Spokane was able to bring her and her car all the way to our house. (Thank You, Lord! And thank you to that person.) As soon as they arrived, I immediately told them all of the reasons why Keith had suggested that I not drive all the way downtown, and apologized profusely for dishonoring my husband, and for making their evening more difficult.

After the driver had left, Mom and I worked on unloading her things and taking them to her room and getting her settled in there. While we were doing that, Keith left for a while, because he desperately needed to be alone, to think and to pray. When he came back a few hours later, my mom and all of the kids were in bed (it was between 11 p.m. and midnight when he returned). I could tell he was still really hurt and angry because his entire being was completely closed off to me.

With my heart pounding and tears aching in my throat the whole time, I told him what God had shown me about how I had pretended to respect him, but had dishonored him in my heart all of those years, just as I had dishonored my father. I begged for his forgiveness and told him I didn’t know how to change myself, but that God would be the One to do the changing, and would he (Keith) please, please be patient with me, and pray for me toward that end?

All was definitely not okay yet after our conversation, but there was a notably marked thawing in what had been a frigid relational atmosphere. A layer of pretense was replaced with a layer of authenticity. And since then, slowly but surely, things have been changing in my heart and in our relationship, day by day.

This is one small part of an ongoing story that began years ago… Will the other parts be written? Only God knows.

Why I blog (one reason anyway)

One of the reasons I enjoy blogging is because it affords opportunities for me to share what's going on in my head and my heart. I say it as I see it. Sometimes I don't see it truthfully or accurately, in fact, most of the time I probably don't, which is why I hope that anyone who reads anything here that they don't agree with, or have questions about, will feel comfortable sharing their thoughts and feelings freely, without reservation. (I promise not to be offended. I may be hurt, but it won’t last very long, and I’ll deeply appreciate your honesty in the long run.)

I don't like believing lies or half-truths. The quest for absolute truth has been a common theme throughout my life so far.

My first resource in that quest is the Holy Spirit Himself, and I call on Him frequently and passionately to examine my heart, thoughts, and motivations, and the parts of myself that I don’t see, and to “guide me in all truth,” as the Word says.

In addition to that, a great way to find out if what I believe on the inside is the truth or not, is to expose it to the light of day by writing and/or speaking about it. I’ve been in bondage to secrets my whole life, until just recently, and am now more than willing to share my innermost feelings and thoughts, even though I might be wrong, or criticized, or even rejected for it. Obviously, there are common-sense boundaries that need to be maintained, but, in light of “Sola Scriptura,” it seems to me there's a great deal of freedom to maneuver within those boundaries.

What got me thinking about this were a friend’s comments (on their blog, not mine) regarding my "The Benefits of Being Chubby" post.

Here are the comments (unchanged except for a few minor typo corrections and one clarification):

I did read [your post] yesterday...and thought about responding but in the end didn’t. Yours was a very honest post Mel, one that said a lot, it was very vulnerable and I respect that. But I disagreed with a number of your conclusions but didn’t want to hinder the transparency by engaging the issues you brought up.

Mel, I would add...that my disagreements were not very big, you just said a lot of loaded statements in my opinion. Stuff that begs some follow up...but these types of issues are so personal and close to peoples hearts...it gets too personal to quick.

*********

I’d like to speak specifically to the following points in these comments:

“But I disagreed with a number of your conclusions but didn’t want to hinder the transparency by engaging the issues you brought up.”

--- Part of the reason I try to be transparent is because I want to know if I’m on the right track or not, and also to inspire freedom of thought and expression in others. If a person wants to address something I’ve said here, I pray that they will, boldly and without fear. I whole-heartedly welcome differing ideas and opinions, and pray that God will be glorified as we all learn how to walk this incredibly treacherous road called life together, instead of in isolation.

*********

“Stuff that begs some follow up...but these types of issues are so personal and close to peoples hearts...it gets too personal to quick.”

--- I guess I’ve had so much of “aloof and detached” that “personal” sounds pretty good. It needs to be a Spirit-led and accountable version of personal for sure. As difficult as that might sound, with the help of an infinite Creator to Whom relationships are precious and valuable, in spite of the difficulty, it must certainly be possible…?

*********

Maybe I’m way off base, and if so, I know that God will correct me as His daughter. He may use people to do that. I’m enjoying learning how to communicate without fear of rejection or failure. But as with anything of value, it comes with a price. May God guide and direct my steps in all things, for His own honor and glory, according to His will, in the precious name of Christ.

Gotta Love Mustard

I received this story in an email many years ago, and laughed so hard I cried. Unfortunately I was going through one of my "delete everything" phases, and ended up deleting it. Since then, I've been doing Google searches trying to find it about once every six months. Finally, yesterday, I found it! It's really gross, but it still makes me laugh until my stomach hurts. :)

**************

As ham sandwiches go, it was perfection. A thick slab of ham, a fresh bun, crisp lettuce and plenty of expensive, light brown, gourmet mustard. With the corners of my jaw aching in anticipation, I carried it to the picnic table in our backyard, picked it up with both hands, but was stopped by my wife suddenly at my side.

"Hold Johnny (our six-week-old son) while I get my sandwich" she said.

I had him balanced between my left elbow and shoulder and was reaching again for the ham sandwich when I noticed a streak of mustard on my fingers.

... I love mustard.
..... I had no napkin.
....... I licked it off.
......... It was not mustard.

No man ever put a baby down faster. It was the first and only time I have ever sprinted with my tongue protruding. With a washcloth in each hand I did the sort of routine shoeshine boys do, only I did it on my tongue.

Later (after she stopped crying from laughing so hard) my wife said, "Now you know why they call that mustard 'Poupon'."

The Benefits of Being Chubby

I find it somewhat ironic that I'm posting this on the same day that Pastor Eric posted about his fitness goals. Sigh... Sometimes life is like that.

I have gained 40 lbs in the last several months. I now weigh more than I ever have except for when I was 9 months pregnant. There are several benefits to this, though, and I really mean that.

For one thing, women no longer look at me like an enemy. There seems to be an unspoken, barely-acknowledged competition thing going on between women these days. Every time a woman walks into a room, every other woman in the room assesses her to see if she might be some sort of threat. Is she prettier than they are? Is she thinner? How's her hair, her clothes, her make-up, her jewelry, etc?

When I was losing weight and fitting into my smaller clothes, many of the men in my life were attentive and complimentary, and there seemed to be a wall between me and many of the women I know. It was unspoken, but it was there. Since I've gained weight, that hidden animosity has all but vanished, and the men are definitely less attentive.

For a person that struggles with pride, this is really a very good thing. And for a Christian woman/wife/mother/employee, etc, it can be a good thing as well. I no longer feel an almost insatiable desire to glance into any and every reflective surface that I pass by. And I realize that any attention I'm getting from anyone, male or female, is going more likely going to be based on who I am, rather than how I look. And, there's no possible way I'll ever be tempted to wear something outside of the house that might not exactly be God-glorifying.

I know I've been called to be a good steward of this body. And I know that when the time is right, God will motivate me and energize me towards that end. But there are still a lot of hidden areas of black, stubborn pride in my heart, and I don't think God is going to bring the weight-loss until most or all of those areas are taken care of.

A Lovely Lady to be Named After

I was named after Melanie Wilkes in the book "Gone With the Wind." When I was a little girl, I hated my name, because it was uncommon. I didn't know any other Melanie's. I desperately wanted to have a more popular name, like Ashley, or Lindsay, or Jennifer. When I was in the 7th grade, I decided to start going by my middle name, which is Deborah. I told everyone at school that my name was Debbie, and went by that name for a whole year. But I found it was too much of a hassle, going by two different names, so after that year I went back to using my first name.

I'm so glad I did.

As an adult, I saw the movie "Gone With the Wind" a time or two, and then I read the book. I absolutely fell in love with Melanie's character in the story, and from then on I have been increasingly grateful for my name, and the fact that I was named after that person specifically. May God help me to become a person like that -- brave, loyal, patient, hard-working, self-sacrificing, and good-hearted to the core.

An Unexpected Gift

I go walking with a very dear friend of mine once a month. Last month when we walked, he was rather down, which is very abnormal for him. After we walked, I sent him an email and told him that if he would like me to, and if we could find a quiet place away from the mainstream, I might sing to him some of the hymns that God has used to lift my heart and put a smile on my face. He responded that, yes, he would like that.

So this past Tuesday we went for our February walk. It was too cold to walk outside, so we went walking in Riverpark Square and through the skywalk system. I brought the words to several hymns with me, and we looked for a quiet place off the beaten path. But we didn't see anything anywhere that looked like it would work.

He's an inspector, so he knows the buildings in Spokane better than most, and he knew of a lobby area that is rarely visited. We went there by taking a elevator that I didn't even know was there, but when we got to the lobby, someone was mopping the floor. So my friend suggested that we take the elevator to the top floor and see what that looked like. It ended up being an entryway to a level of condos on the top floor of one of the downtown buildings. It was a small area, probably about 15X30 ft.

I've never sung for anyone, by myself and unaccompanied, before, except my own family. So I told him I was going to close my eyes and pretend he wasn't there, and I gave him the words to follow along with. I had barely sung 3 words when the elevator door chimed, and my eyes snapped open and I put my hand over my mouth, quite embarassed.

It ended up being the same fellow who had been mopping the floor in the area we'd originally intended to use. He asked us if we were waiting for someone, and my friend said, "No, we were just looking for a quite place to read something." The kind man offered to let us in to a model unit condo that happened to be just down the hall from where we were, but even if we had known it was there, we couldn't have gotten to it because the hall was sealed by a locked door. He opened the door for us, and opened the door to the model unit. It was empty, except for a table in the great room where consultations must take place with people who are looking to buy condos in that building.

We thanked him extravagantly, and I was able to sing the hymns for my friend in a beautiful room full of windows and vaulted ceilings, with incredible acoustics. My friend cried, and we prayed together, and it was such an incredible, beautiful, uplifting time. Like a cool fresh green oasis in the middle of a scorching desert. I know that it was God's gift to both of us that day. I've never experienced anything quite like it.

Only God Sees the Whole Picture

From the blog “Flying Embers," posted on November 9, 2008.

(This re-post is the perfect compliment to something that was said in a recent conversation in my life, something that I wanted to write down but didn't have a chance to at the time. It went something like this: I believe that, by God's grace, every single living person should be granted to understand that they don't see everything about everything and everyone--only God does. Our perception of reality is warped, and always will be until we get to Heaven, and usually there's a very good reason why we haven't been allowed to see the whole truth in a situation. Perhaps learning how to love unconditionally and not judge people or be critical of them is one of the reasons...?)

***********

Here's Fred's original post:

In the following quote from Isaac Watts’s book “Improving the Mind”; he addresses how we should take into consideration all circumstances surrounding an action; the persons, the time, place, manner, the purpose, etc. He uses a great little illustration to make his point. Now please, dog lovers don’t be prejudiced by the first line….

“Let me give a plain instance for the illustration of this matter. Mario kills a dog, which, considered merely in itself, seems to be an indifferent action: now the dog was Timon’s and not his own; this makes it look unlawful. But Timon bid him do it; this gives it an appearance of lawfulness again. It was done at church, and in time of Divine service; these circumstances added, cast on it an air of irreligion. But the dog flew at Mario, and put him in danger of his life; this relieves the seeming impiety of the action.

Yet Mario might have escaped by flying thence; therefore the action appears to be improper. But the dog was known to be mad; this further circumstance makes it almost necessary that the dog should be slain, lest he might worry the assembly, and do much mischief.

Yet again, Mario killed him with a pistol, which he happened to have in his pocket since yesterday’s journey; now, hereby the whole congregation was terrified and discomposed, and Divine service was broken off, this carries an appearance of great indecency and impropriety in it: but, after all, when we consider a further circumstance, that Mario, being thus violently assaulted by a mad dog, had no way of escape, and had no other weapon about him, it seems to take away all the colors of impropriety, indecency, or unlawfulness, and to allow that the preservation of one or many lives will justify the act as wise and good.

Now, all these concurrent appendices of the action ought to be surveyed, in order to pronounce with justice and truth concerning it. There are a multitude of human actions in private life, in domestic affairs, in traffic, in civil government, in courts of justice, in schools of learning, etc. which have so many complicated circumstances, aspects, and situations, with regard to time and place, persons and things, that it is impossible for any one to pass a right judgment concerning them without entering into most of these circumstances, and surveying them extensively, and comparing and balancing them all rightly.”

(Here's my comment to the post, which is something that I feel still very strongly, and hopefully always will:)

I love this post! I've seen it played out in my own life over and over again. Hear a story from one person's perspective and sympathize with them, take up their offense and be offended against the person they're offended against. Then hear the same story from the other person's perspective and realize that there's way more to it than first met the eye.

Anymore, I like to tell people I consider myself Switzerland--neutral territory. It's not even worth the energy to judge or criticize someone else or be offended against them, because I know for a fact that if I were aware of every detail of the situation, I'd feel completely differently.

It's actually quite a freeing place to be... Because even if we, as humans, know every detail of a story that can be seen or understood with the human mind, there are still all of the complex mysteries involving thoughts, motives, desires and histories that only God could ever possibly know. So why not just leave it in His hands, and set ourselves to the more important tasks in our lives--loving God, and loving people... Loving, not judging. Yours in Christ, Mel

Whetting my Appetite for God's Word

Chris, the author of the blog "Pilgrim in Conflict," posted a comment on a previous blog post in which he linked to this portion of the book “When I Don’t Desire God” by John Piper. Ever since I read it the first time, God has used these words of wisdom to draw my heart nearer to Himself.

************

I—(Incline!) The first thing my soul needs is an inclination toward God and his Word. Without that, nothing else will happen of any value in my life. I must want to know God and read his Word and draw near to him. Where does that “want to” come from? It comes from God. So Psalm 119:36 teaches us to pray, “Incline my heart to your testimonies, and not to selfish gain!” Very simply we ask God to take our hearts, which are more inclined to breakfast and the newspaper, and change that inclination. We are asking that God create desires that are not there.

O—(Open!) Next I need to have the eyes of my heart opened so that when my inclination leads me to the Word, I see what is really there, and not just my own ideas. Who opens the eyes of the heart? God does. So Psalm 119:18 teaches us to pray, “Open my eyes, that I may behold wondrous things out of your law.” So many times we read the Bible and see nothing wonderful. Its reading does not pro­duce joy. So what can we do? We can cry to God: “Open the eyes of my heart, O Lord, to see what it says about you as wonderful.”

U—(Unite!) Then I am concerned that my heart is badly frag­mented. Parts of it are inclined, and parts of it are not. Parts see won­der, and parts say, “That’s not so wonderful.” What I long for is a united heart where all the parts say a joyful Yes! to what God reveals in his Word. Where does that wholeness and unity come from? It comes from God. So Psalm 86:11 teaches us to pray, “Unite my heart to fear your name.” Don’t stumble over the word fear when you thought we were seeking joy. The fear of the Lord is a joyful experi­ence when you renounce all sin. A thunderstorm can be a trembling joy when you know you can’t be destroyed by lightning. “O Lord, let your ear be attentive to . . . the prayer of your servants who delight to fear your name” (Neh. 1:11). “His delight shall be in the fear of the LORD” (Isa. 11:3). Therefore pray that God would unite your heart to joyfully fear the Lord.

S—(Satisfy!) What I really want from all this engagement with the Word of God and the work of his Spirit in answer to my prayers is for my heart to be satisfied with God and not with the world. Where does that satisfaction come from? It comes from God. So Psalm 90:14 teaches us to pray, “Satisfy us in the morning with your steadfast love, that we may rejoice and be glad all our days.”

(picture by Satashi Matsuyama, one of my favorite artists)

Feels like coming home....

Contented Sigh…

Finally, finally, FINALLY (did I say finally?) -- it’s the 27th!! Woo Hoo!!

It’s SO GREAT to be back to the blogosphere! I have missed this soooo much, and have been counting down the days to this day for a whole month. I’m hoping to write and post most of the story around why I haven’t blogged for the last 30 days, but it’s going to be very tricky to write, and may end up not happening, unfortunately.

During the past 30 days, there are several blog posts from other people’s blogs that have been brought to my mind over and over again, and that I’ve tried to share the main ideas of with other people. I hope to find those posts again and post them on this blog where they will be preserved for myself and my family for many years to come, Lord willing, for the glory of God.

Also during these days, I’ve been spending time listening to the New Testament on CD in my truck during the commute to and from work. What a blessing! The dramatized audio word-for-word reading of the scriptures is contained all on one disc because of the beauty of modern-day technology in the form of MP3 files. Thank You God, and thank you New Hope, for providing this marvelous resource!

(See this website for more details: http://www.faithcomesbyhearing.com/)

At the end of the disc there were several stories shared by someone who works with this organization, stories that left an indelible mark on my soul. One of their main purposes is to get the New Testament translated (in audio form) into the languages of all of the unreached people of the world, most of whom cannot read. There are people in the world who believe the God does not speak their language, and that He has to speak to them through an interpreter. By God’s power working through them, Faith Comes by Hearing is changing that.

God has also been taking me on a journey towards loving, valuing and craving His Word more and more every day. It started years ago, when I would hear people talking about how much they craved God’s Word, and how fulfilling it was to them to spend hours and hours reading, praying and studying. I recognized the absence of that kind of craving in my own heart and life, and began to ask God to give me more of a love for and desire for His Word.

Since then, God has brought about the answer to that prayer through various methods. Blogging has been one of them, as I’ve read the words of fellow bloggers who cherish God’s Word, and who post the words of men and women of the past who also cherished it, and wrote about its value so eloquently. Then in May 2008, our family went to a theme park in Orlando, FL called “The Holy Land Experience.”

While we were there, we were privileged to hear a 30-minute lecture about William Tyndale, who was responsible, in large part, for the wording used in the translation of the scriptures known as “The King James Version.” His life was dedicated to and given for the all-encompassing vision he had to see the scriptures translated into English from their original languages. God used that lecture to open my eyes to see how much has been given and sacrificed to bring us the priceless treasure that is the Bible.

He also used the ancient truths housed in a hymn called “O Word of God Incarnate.” When I recently heard it on the “Glad: Acapella Hymns” CD, it captured my heart so fully that I soon thereafter found all of the words online and set myself to memorizing them. As I would sing those words, the Holy Spirit would turn them into a prayer resounding from the deepest part of my soul.

************

Here are the words, for anyone who might be interested:

O Word of God incarnate, O Wisdom from on high,

O Truth unchanged, unchanging, O Light of our dark sky:

We praise You for the radiance that from the hallowed page,

A Lantern to our footsteps, shines on from age to age.

The Church from You, our Savior, received the Gift divine,

And still that Light is lifted over all the earth to shine.

It is the sacred Vessel where gems of truth are stored;

It is the heaven drawn Picture of Christ, the living Word.

The Scripture is a banner before God’s host unfurled;

It is a shining Beacon above the darkling world.

It is the Chart and Compass that over life’s surging tide,

Mid mists and rocks and quicksands, to You, O Christ, will guide.

O make your Church, dear Savior, a lamp of purest gold,

To bear before the nations Your true light as of old.

O teach your wandering pilgrims by this their path to trace,

Till, clouds and darkness ended, they see You face to face.

*************

Ever since these words have been stored in my heart, the craving for more of God’s Word has been cemented. (Thank You, Father!) According to God’s infinite and holy grace, He has answered my prayer and allowed me to become of those people who would rather read His Word, or listen to His Word, than anything else on Earth.

I’ve been immersing myself passionately, whole-heartedly and joyfully in studying the history of the English-language Bible. The William Tyndale story is just a tiny drop in the bucket of the lavish, interesting, and intriguing string of events and people that God worked through to bring us the Bible as it is today. If you’re interested in reading more about it, here’s the website I’ve been reading mostly:

http://www.greatsite.com/timeline-english-bible-history/index.html

There are incredible pictures on this website of pages of Bibles dating back as far as the 1400’s and 1500’s and even earlier. They make my spiritual taste-buds water. I’ve been enjoying this study so profoundly that I’m considering taking classes at a Bible college to learn more about it, officially. The irony in this is that when I was a kid in school, I hated history. It was my worst subject. I’m so glad God has a sense of humor…

*************

One more thing… I’ve decided to try to start posting about at least some of the movies I see that I find some sort of life-enriching value in. I’ve found several great movies by looking at friends’ blogs, and I greatly appreciate it when my friends recommend good movies, especially since there are so many different films to choose from. If you’re a fellow blogger, and you notice a post on my blog about a movie you recommended on your blog, please take it as a compliment of the highest sort!

Mama Mia!

We watched this movie last night, and everyone absolutely loved it. I expected to like it, but I didn't expect to enjoy it quite as much as I did. The music was beautiful (featuring the music of the band "Abba"), as was the setting--a thoroughly entertaining show! The story line was definitely not an example of righteous living, but it did open doors to communication about the lies the enemy sends regarding sex, marriage and romance.

My husband is so cute... He loves music, and after the movie he spent an hour or so online researching the band's music and history. His music collection is mostly Christian, but my mom happened to have a copy of an Abba compilation album. So after he was done browsing the web, he played some of his favorite Abba songs on the stereo. The kids spent some time with him in the music room while I was cleaning up the kitchen and listening to the goings on from in there. It was a wonderful evening of family time and togetherness. Thank You, Lord, for the blessings and beauty of simple pleasures.

Diamonds in the Air!

When I woke up this morning, the sun was shining. And it was snowing. The snow flakes were the tiny, light-as-air kind that seem to be taking their sweet time making their way from the sky to the ground, and as the sun shone on them, the air seemed to be literally filled with glistening, sparkling diamonds. It was so beautiful, I could have stood at the window all morning, praising God for the incredible breathtaking beauty of His creation. Thank You, Lord!

Winter Wonderland

Where do I even begin...? It started snowing on Wednesday, and it hasn't really stopped yet, not for more than a couple of hours.

I don't really mind the snow... In fact, I love it. No matter how much it snows or for how long, there's always a part of my heart that's disappointed when it stops. So this snowstorm has been a gift to my heart. That said, I wish I could clone myself and send my clones out to help everyone shovel their sidewalks and driveways, because I know that all this snow is causing a lot of problems for a lot of people. I pray that God will send kind-hearted people (like the Blauers) to help them with these needs.

This is what my mom's car looked like when we all woke up yesterday.

Yesterday I got up to go to work in the morning and was going to stop by my coworker's house to get her, because she was snowed in. Even though I was in a 4-wheel-drive Toyota truck with good ground clearance, I didn't make it more than 10 feet out of the driveway before I got stuck. I called my coworker and my boss to let them know I wouldn't be in yesterday, but then my boss called back about 30 minutes later to say City Hall was closed for the day...

This all happened about an hour after I had sent an email to a few of my blogging buddies letting them know I was going on a blogging fast. I guess God had other ideas.

Wednesday was "one of those days." A when-it-rains-it-pours day. My husband called it "miserable." He didn't say it with a bad attitude, but he did say it with a long sigh.

First the snow came and didn't quit, and there were wrecks and delays all over the region. On his way home from work, my husband's car was T-boned by a person driving too fast for conditions. Did did the other driver have insurance? Nope. And he's a business owner. How does that work? You can't see it very well in this picture, but the back door on the driver's side is pretty well smashed in. I feel sorry for Keith because he's always tried so hard and done such a great job of being a good steward of this car since bying it new in 1994.

That same day, Stephen had a little tussle with an icy sidewalk. He slipped and fell and hit his eyebrow on the hard ice. The bump was the size of a small marble when I got home from work, but by the time he went to bed, it was the size of half a golf ball. He could barely open his eye and I was concerned that we might need to brave the weather to take him to the ER. But God provided a registered nurse for us to talk to over the phone through our pediatrician's office, and by His grace we didn't end up having to leave the house, and Stephen's bump started getting better on it's own. Thank You, Lord!

I spent about 3 hours in the morning shoveling our back deck and the front sidewalk, and enjoying every minute of it. But actually, Linnea is our honorary shoveler, and it took her 5 or 6 hours to shovel our massive driveway yesterday, but her puppy, Bandit, kept her company and helped her to find joy in her work. By the time she came back into the house, she was frozen like a popsicle, tired and sore. But she had a relatively good attitude, and I was and am really proud of her. After she had a drink and some warm soup, she took a 3-hour nap on the couch, wrapped in my favorite down comforter.

Keith decided he wanted to take his car to get an estimate for the door repairs. I was whole-heartedly against the idea, but I remembered the excerpt from Fight Like a Girl that talked about not using manipulation to try to control people. So I just said, even-keel, "Sweety, I want to go on record as saying I'm opposed to this idea. I wish you would stay home."

"Why?" he asked.

"Well," I replied, "I don't want you to get into a wreck, or to get stuck."

"I've already been in a wreck."

"I know, and I don't want you to be in another one."

"And I'm not going to get stuck." (Famous last words.)

At that point I just shrugged my shoulders, and on the inside I was praying, praying, praying for God's will to be done. I realize that these weather conditions provide a manly challenge. After all, the snowy roads are something to be tamed and conquered!

However, even after giving himself a running start from the top of our relatively long driveway, his car (an all-wheel-drive Subaru) got stuck in the middle of the cul-de-sac, and several neighbors helped to dig him out.

Yesterday, Thursday, was a really great day in our home, all in all. My mom and I got all of the wrapping done. Here she is, the wrapping queen!

The gifts she wrapped are works of art - total candy for the eyes with ribbons and bows and sparkles. Mine are just standard wrapped gifts with no embelishments. But that's okay. We sang hymns and talked and had a great time wrapping together.

I'm thanking God continuously for this marvelous gift of time He's given me in these couple of days home from work. It does my heart good to be here with my family. I'm praying that His will be done in this day, in all things, by His grace, and for His honor and glory.

By the way, this is a picture of the "Twisted Willow" in our back yard. My mom told me I should take a picture of it because it and the snow formations on it look interesting.

And here's a picture of Megan, Becca and Stephen all decked out in their snow-wear, getting ready to enjoy some time in the great snowy outdoors.

Merry Christmas!!

I love Christmas! The lights, the music, the scents, the yummy goodies, the Christmas cards, the special times with family and friends, the crowds at the stores, the shopping, the traditions, the church and school Christmas programs – all of it!

This Christmas season has been considerably different for me than other Christmas seasons have been. Keith is doing the shopping (Praise God!) because there’s absolutely no way that I can stay within a budget, and I have proved it over and over again. And as God has freed me from the obligation of Christmas cards and Christmas baking (Thank You, Lord!)… His Spirit, His Word, His promise, His miraculous gift… They’re all I need to be utterly overflowing with joy and peace and thanksgiving this Holiday season.

I pray God will be all my children need as well. He is, of course, extravagantly more than they need, but they don't realize it yet, and I do so hope they soon will. I pray that God will do a renewing work deep in their hearts, resetting their appetites and desires so that they will sincerely hunger for that which is true, noble, right, pure, lovely, admirable, excellent and praiseworthy. (see Phil 4:8) And I also pray that they will be so satisfied with all that God is for them in Christ, that they will learn how to be content no matter what. We’re definitely not there yet, not by a long shot. But I believe that God has placed this delightful goal in front of us, and that by His grace alone we will continue to put one foot in front of the other as we cling to Him and to the Cross.

Merry Christmas to any who may read this! I pray that everyone is enjoying and being grateful for the good things of the season, and that the enemy will not be able to steal our joy as we celebrate God’s Magnificent Gift!

The Word of God

God has been calling me back to the truth and beauty and purity of His Word. The last couple of years I’ve been on a feeding frenzy reading books and articles and blogs and websites ABOUT God’s Word. But now He’s placed a hunger in my heart for His Word alone, and I’m LOVING it!

Whenever I start to read the Bible, I do so realizing that the same Spirit that wrote the Book also resides in my heart, and is ready, willing and able to interpret it to my heart and life. My prayer is that He will use His Word more and more in every encounter, to deeply renew and regenerate my heart and mind so that love, righteousness, truth and beauty will flow through all of my life naturally. In every word, thought, attitude, action, reaction, decision, conversation, etc.

I’ve been feeling a bit of unrest lately in my Awana class, and asking God to show me the source of it. The other day I was standing in our kitchen having a conversation with my 6-year-old son, Stephen, and God opened my eyes to see what’s been bothering me. I asked Stephen a question, and in the lull between the question and answer, God showed me that Stephen wasn’t at all concerned with answering the question honestly. His whole focus was on finding the “right” answer, the answer he thought I wanted to hear.

It seems to be the same way with most of our church kids. They think all of this scripture memorization is so they can earn points for their teams and get a piece of candy at the end of the evening... When will they understand that these are the Words of the Living God? And that they are precious beyond comprehension and Something to be treasured and sought after? I know that only the Holy Spirit can do that in them, and I'm praying, praying, praying that He'll grab hold of their hearts and open their eyes.

Then the other day I was reading in Matthew and God opened my eyes to see something else. The Pharisees were scripture-soaked. Most of them had more of the Holy Scriptures memorized than any of us will ever even read. When Jesus asked them questions, they either didn’t answer at all, or they answered the question correctly. Most of the time, they answered the question correctly. They had so much of God’s Word committed to memory, and yet that Word had ever penetrated their hearts.

God used that reality to show me just how worthless a correct answer really is if it doesn’t flow from a heart that has been reborn into His kingdom.

For all of their head knowledge, the Pharisees were cold, wicked, heartless and prideful. Whenever Jesus told them a parable and they figured out that THEY were the bad guys in the story… Were they humbled? Were their eyes opened? Did they cry out “Oh my God, please help us for we are a wicked people desperately in need of your mercy and grace!” No... Far from it. Their attitude indignantly said, “He’s talking about US! Let’s KILL Him!” (What I find really scary about that, is the Pharisees truly believed they were on God’s side, and He was on theirs.)

Contrast their prideful reaction with the humble reaction of King David when Nathan told him the story of the rich man who took the one sheep of his poor neighbor and slaughtered it, instead of using one of the many sheep he owned already. (See II Samuel 12) When he found out that he was the bad guy in the story, David said, “I have sinned against the Lord,” and Psalm 51 was born by the Spirit out of a humble and God-glorifying heart.

Oh, Father God, I pray that You will give me (and my children, and any who hear Your heart in this message) humble hearts like King David. Hearts that are quick to receive your correction and quick to repent of wrongdoing. Hearts that acknowledge that You are our Source, and there is no righteousness, truth or beauty apart from You. In Jesus’ Name, amen.

A Charmed Life

A charmed life. A full life. A life that does not provide very much time for blogging…

This is my family. This picture was taken in Riverfront Park in Spokane in October 2007.

Keith is 46 years old. In fact, he just celebrated his birthday on November 30th. Happy Birthday, Sweety! He and I have been married for 12 years. We celebrated our 12th anniversary on August 29th. When we met, he had two beautiful daughters, Lisa (25) and Kristina (21), and I had a daughter, Linnea (13). Then, together, we had Megan (11), Stephen (6), Rebecca (3) and Michael (2).

Here are some recent pictures of them. Some of these pictures are from this Thanksgiving.

Lisa and Kristina enjoying some sister time in the kitchen
Linnea the bookworm, reading Frank Peretti book, “The Oath”

and here’s Linnea goofing off with Michael

Megan likes to spend time with Michael, too. Here they are together

Michael has this new thing right now. He’s become quite fond of the camera, and whenever he sees it, he runs up to me and says, “Smile, please, Mom?” He doesn’t pronounce his words quite correctly yet, so the phrase comes out sounding like “My-o peas Mom.” It’s pretty darn cute.

Rebecca (the blond) with our granddaughter Alexis (the redhead, 4 years old)

Rebecca playing dress-up in a Dora dress
Here’s Stephen proudly displaying one of his more recent Tinker Toy inventions

When we met, Keith lived in this house:
He had lived there for 8 years, and we continued to live there for another 10 years after that. It was rather small for such a large family. It had 5 bedrooms and 1 bathroom, but two of the bedrooms were in the basement and had non-egress windows, and one of them was dedicated solely to storage. The house was roughly 1800 square feet.

In April of 2006, we moved to this 5 bedroom, 4 bath, 3,400 sq ft house about ½ mile away from the old one…

It’s wonderful because it’s on a cul-de-sac, so there’s no traffic to worry about, and the kids can play outside with relative freedom. But the back yard has a gate that opens up right across the street from three schools--an elementary school, a junior high school, and a high school. And it’s really nice not to have to stand in line for the bathroom. It is, however, a lot of work to take care of. It’s all good. All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy. But all play and no work is far worse… It makes Jack and Jill spoiled rotten ungrateful brats. It’s been a fun and exciting challenge trying to find ways for everyone to work together to get everything done to take care of what God has trusted us with.

On top of having a big family and big home with a big yard in a nice neighborhood filled with big beautiful homes (whose owners of course expect a certain level of upkeep from their neighbors), I joyfully spend a lot of time at our church, New Hope Christian Center. We’ve been attending this church since 1996, just a couple weeks after we got married. Pastor Eric’s father-in-law, Leroy Hunt, is our pastor.

I am blessed and privileged to be a member of the worship team right now, which means being at church at 8:15 or 8:30 a.m. on Sunday mornings and at worship practice on the first and third Thursdays of most months. Plus, Keith and I attend the Celebrate Recovery class every Tuesday night and teach Awana every Wednesday night. We love our church so much. She will be our church home for as long as her doors are open, which I pray will be for the rest of our lives.

On top of all of that, I work full time for the City of Spokane in this beautiful historical building across the street from Riverfront Park and River Park Square (a beautiful shopping mall). This building used to be a Montgomery Wards store.

This is my messy desk in the office I work in, the Clerk’s Office. I truly love my job, and I’m incredibly grateful for it, but there’s so much to do, that even though the four of us are working as fast and as hard as we can, we’re hardly keeping our heads above water. The full days pass by in such a blur, it sometimes actually leaves me feeling breathless.

My mom moved in with us at the end of November. It’s been awesome having her here. She and Megan, especially, have been spending a lot of time together, which has filled deep needs in both of their hearts. She is in the only bedroom in the house that has two windows in it, because she loves plants and light and beautiful things. Here she is proudly displaying some of the necklaces she’s made recently, as well as a couple of pictures of her beautiful flowers and the plants in her room.


God's richest blessings to everyone reading this, and a big thank you to my family for letting me be away from them for a few hours while I put this post together.

So, so, sooooo much to be thankful for!

This is Thanksgiving week! There’s no doubt about it… I am overwhelmed with blessings. I think, if we’re honest with ourselves, most of us could probably say that. Words from one of Pastor Eric’s messages, spoken many years ago at New Hope, echo through my mind and heart…. “Why do you think He says over and over again, ‘Be thankful, be thankful, be thankful…’?” He was making a point of how God wants us to see and appreciate what He has already blessed us with, instead of constantly wanting and striving for more, and whining and complaining, and being pride-fully discontented.

I’ve been away from the computer almost entirely since checking in with some of my favorite blogs on Friday, November 14th, 2008. My mother moved in that evening, Praise God, and I’ve been trying to listen to the Holy Spirit as I’ve been seeking His help in ordering my priorities and the way I spend my time since then.

I’m working on a blog post for the benefit of my fellow bloggers who I also consider to be good friends, namely, Pastor Eric, Fred, Joseph, Chris and Dianna (in order by whom I met first to whom I met most recently). I’m hoping it will be a somewhat concise and yet comprehensive overview of my family and life, as they are right now, in writing and pictures. I’m greatly missing our blogging interactions, and am praying that God will provide a way for me to have some more time to engage in this, one of my most favorite of activities. But if that doesn’t happen, please know what a profound blessing each of you has been to me and how irrevocably my life has been changed by your influence, and God’s influence through you.

For Thanksgiving, we’re going to be going to my in-laws’ place in the mountains outside of Colville. It’s a much-needed yearly retreat away from the noise and hectic pace of my normal life, and I look forward to it with great anticipation. Tons of great food made by my mother-in-law, Nancy, and the sights and smells that go along with them… Serene, picturesque and quiet mountain scenery… Seeing and hearing my children playing together (in peace, Lord willing)… Late-night movies and games of Scrabble… Amazing wildlife and my father-in-law’s beautiful horses… Truly fresh air… The warmth of a blazing fire… Sigh… I long to be there right now.

Ooops, my lunch hour is almost over. If I don’t post this now, it probably won’t be posted until next week or the week after. There’s so much more I want to say… so much more that’s on my heart. Perhaps God will help me to remember it all at a later time. Signing off…