
Tuesday, October 19, 2010
A Favorite Quote from Beth Moore

Honey, I'm home!
I find it hard to describe how I feel right now... How I have been feeling for the last month or so. It's as though the real me has been on vacation for many months, and, after wandering and wading through the swamp and the muck of anger, pride, confusion, disillusionment, etc., has finally found a way to come home again. Beth Moore would call it a season of sifting, which God was using, has used, and is using, to sift some of the impurities out of my heart and life. Monday, October 18, 2010
I haven't forgotten
Saturday, March 06, 2010
So much to catch up on...
Let's see... Where do I even begin?Keith and I renewed our vows on Valentine's Day, and the ceremony was absolutely wonderful! If you'd like to see pictures, try this link. After that, we went on a 2nd honeymoon, just for a few days, but they were fairytale days. We enjoyed each other's company more thoroughly and peacefully than we ever have before. It was so amazing to feel zero stress! Everything about those days was good.
Now we're working at getting settled back in to all of us living together as a family. While my marriage is better than I ever imagined it could be, I still find myself feeling overwhelmed by the needs of the five children that live with us. I can't possibly meet the needs of 5 different people all the time, and am trying to find a balance that works for all of us. I so desperately want to have a home that is full of peace and joy, but is that even possible? Nothing is impossible with God. I keep telling myself that, like a mantra. And I take things one day at a time and try not to have unrealistic expectations.
I was doing pretty well losing weight there for a while, until the stress started building up again. Stress and me don't seem to get along very well. Cortisol, the stress hormone, turns on all of the fat storage programs in my body, apparently. Does that mean I'll never be able to lose weight until my kids are grown up and have left the nest? Dear Lord, I do hope not.
Lisa and Kristina are both doing very well. They're happy, and in relationships with men who are very good for them, and that they are very good for themselves. Things are really working out so very well for both of them, and I'm so grateful to be able to witness it all.
I've been having a great time keeping in touch with people (including myself) through Facebook and text messaging. And sometimes on the bus I'm able to do some reading, when it's not too hot. If it's too hot on the bus, I can't read because I get motion sickness.
I know I'm rambling, but at least these thoughts are being written down before they fly the coop, so to speak.
Life is good, God is GREAT, and I'm so excited to be back with my family again, I can hardly find words to express it. Love and gratitude are simply overflowing.
I took this picture on our second honeymoon, when we went for a walk on the one sunny day we had.
Wednesday, January 13, 2010
Learned and Learning
I’m sitting here trying to think of some of the main concepts I’ve learned since August 3rd, 2009, a day that will live in bittersweet infamy for the rest of my life. This is like a test for myself, to see how well I can do at remembering these ideas, without the books being right in front of me. Of course, some of what I’ve learned has already been so ingrained in my thinking that they are no longer conscious thoughts. But I still think it’s important to recall and articulate the basic principles so I can remind myself, and so I can teach them to my children. I’m going to write these things down as I think of them, so they’re not in any particular order:Lesson No. 1: Always tell the truth, even when it’s hard or uncomfortable. I’ve been notoriously bad about hiding and/or distorting the truth of how I feel, what I like and dislike, what I want and don’t want, what I believe and don’t believe, etc, etc, etc, for the sake of preserving what I believe to be the perceptions other people have of me. “Changes the Heal” taught me the importance of being real. Jesus said “Woe to you when all men think well of you.” Well, that was me. Pretty much everyone liked me, and it was because I had conformed myself to an image of what I thought they wanted, so much so that I lost who I really was, and am still in the process of finding that lost person.
Lessons 2-? (there’s more than one lesson in this paragraph): That I am an adult, and am free to make my own choices. It is my responsibility to live with the consequences of those choices, and to allow others to live with the consequences of theirs. It’s important to be sensitive and empathetic regarding the feelings of others, while refusing to take responsibility for those feelings. A person’s feelings, thoughts, actions, attitudes, choices, desires, likes, dislikes, etc. belong to that person, and when one person takes responsibility for something that falls within the ownership of someone else, boundary lines are blurred, individuality is lost, and authenticity is threatened. People can connect in real and intimate ways with other people most effectively when they are honest and transparent first with themselves, and then with each other.
I suppose I should post this now, considering I’ve been working on it off and on for three days. J There’s a lot more that I’ve learned these last few months, and I hope to record those lessons as well, as they come to mind. (Photo from the Internet, added on 2/8/10)
Monday, January 11, 2010
Thank you
Thank you Everyone for the welcoming, gracious, supportive and encouraging comments. I have missed you all so much. I nabbed this picture from an email someone sent me this morning... Isn't it beautiful?Please pray for my daughter, Megan. She's in the hospital. I can't share more than that because she swore me to secrecy, but let's just say that she - and we - desperately need to see God's grace and glory revealed in this situation.
Many blessings and grace and peace to all of you and your families. I will post when I can. The posts without pictures are the ones I'm posting via email, and pictures don't come through that way for some reason.
Until we meet again... :)
Friday, January 08, 2010
Something new to look forward to
One of the biggest changes in the way I think and feel is that I really, really want to be a stay-at-home mom. I’ve haven’t wanted that in a long time, if ever. Basically, the idea scared me half to death. For many years I’ve been clinging to my work as my lifeline to sanity. I feel competent and confident at work in a way that I never have at home – as a wife, a mother, or a homemaker. However, after reading two fabulously incredible books, “Changes that Heal” by Dr. Henry Cloud and “Boundaries in Marriage” by Dr. Henry Cloud and Dr. John Townsend, I feel far more ready to face and embrace the challenges, hard work, and rewards that necessarily go hand-in-hand with such a life. (photo from the internet, added on 2/8/10)
Rethinking Already
After I published that last post, I decided to invite my closest friends and family to read my blog, if they want to. And if they don’t want to, that’s totally okay, too. Whomever reads this, my prayer is that your life is being flooded with the grace, peace, abundance and vitality of Christ! (Photo from the internet, added on 2/8/10)
A Blog that is a journal - for real!
Monday, August 17, 2009
Changes, Changes
Katrena took this picture in Riverfront Park, just a few weeks ago, just a block or two from where I sit writing this.On Monday August 3, 2009, I moved out of the house. On Friday, August 14, 2009, I moved in to a little apartment about 10 minutes from the house. I don't have a computer there, and I don't want to get one. It's been so great to spend time with people face to face, and not to feel constantly torn by conflicting desires and emotions. And since I'm not supposed to use my work computer for personal matters, either, I guess this is it for blogging for the foreseeable future. If anyone wants to stay in touch, my email address is tweeten1@yahoo.com, and I'll probably be checking it about once a month.
I wish every single reader of this blog an abundance of all of God's richest blessings, favor, presence and protection. My season of blogging has meant the world to me, and perhaps someday I'll return to blogging for another season. May God's will be done in all things, by His grace and for His honor and glory, in the precious name of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ.
Monday, July 27, 2009
Kindness
Thursday, July 23, 2009
My Favorite Scene from Moulin Rouge
I just posted this, but deleted it and am reposting it in an attempt to find a prettier part of the scene to be on the "front cover" (so to speak). Anyway, I could watch this part of the movie 1,000 time without growing weary of it. I hope others will enjoy it as well.
Trying to make it all fit
Life is so amazingly, incredibly, breathtakingly full! I can't believe it's been like two weeks since my last post. Where in the world does the time go...??
Yesterday I finished the last of my continuing education classes, so I'll be able to renew my insurance license now. Whew! That's a load off my mind. I won't have to do that again for another two years. Yippee!!
When Fred was here visiting in Spokane, he brought me a lovely stack of books. I'm in the middle of reading three of them right now. I'm so glad to be able to have more time to read now that my insurance classes are done. I'm particularly enjoying a little book called "Abide in Me," which is based on the passage in John where Jesus uses the illustration of the vine and the branches to help us understand our relationship with Himself. The book is meant to be read slowly--one chapter per day. But I'm enjoying it so much that I'm having a hard time reading it at that pace. However, putting it down is made easier because the other book I have in my bag is a book of prayers and meditations from Mother Teresa, and I'm enjoying that one very much also. Mother Teresa is definitely one of my heroes, and her words are like a healing balm to my very weary soul. Thank you, Fred, so much, for your graciousness... :)
I've also been spending some time recently utilizing the wonderous modern-day internet miracle that is Facebook. It's made it possible for me to re-connect with friends from school that I haven't seen or had any contact with at all since the early 90's. It's also a great way to stay in touch with a lot of people on a daily basis. I'm loving it!
God is so good. I pray that He will help me to abide in Him fully, even in the midst of hectic, chaotic situations, and that He will be glorified in all I say and do.
Thursday, July 09, 2009
My New Old Mantra -- "Simplify!"
(My daughter Lisa took this really cute picture of Rebecca while we were visiting my in-laws over the 4th of July weekend. I think she should go in to photography... She has a gift!)I feel a desperate need to eliminate clutter and restore order in my life. You should see my craft room... I would post a picture of it, but it would only serve to clutter up my blog and scare the daylights out of everyone who saw it. I know I've said this before, but I hope I really mean it this time.
Good grief! Is there a pill a person can take to cure double-mindedness? The Bible says that a double-minded person is unstable in all of their ways. I've been praying against this as long as I've known that it was a bad thing. But I'm still double-minded and wishy-washy. It's sickening. Most of the problems in my life are problems of my own making that stem from indecisiveness and a lack of discipline. I disgust myself sometimes.
Another thing I want to do is to teach my kids and myself the 8 habits (discovered and unveiled by Dr. Stephen Covey) until they're so deeply ingrained in our hearts that they'll never be able to be removed. Here they are in a nutshell:
Be Proactive
Begin with the End in Mind
Keep First things First
Think Win-Win
Seek First to Understand, then to be Understood
Synergize
Sharpen the Saw
Find Your Voice and Help Others Find Theirs
These principles, if applied faithfully and in the right spirit, cannot help but to enhance individual lives, and, in turn, make the world a better place.
Wednesday, July 08, 2009
Words To Live By

This is from the book The Secret Message of Jesus. It's on my fridge at home and on my desk at work. I try to live by these words every day of my life.
The Kingdom Manifesto of Christ:
Be poor in spirit, mourn, be meek, hunger and thirst for true righteousness, be merciful, be pure in heart, be a peacemaker, be willing to joyfully suffer persecution and insult for doing what is right.
Be salt and light in the world—by doing good works. Do not hate or indulge in anger, but instead seek to reconcile. Do not lust or be sexually unfaithful in your heart. Do not presume to make vows, but have simple speech, where yes means yes and no [means] no.
Do not get revenge, but find creative and nonviolent ways to overcome evil done to you.
Love your enemies, as God does, and be generous to everyone, as God is.
Give to the poor, pray, and fast secretly.
Don't let greed cloud your outlook, but store up treasure in heaven through generosity.
Don't worry about your own daily needs, but instead trust yourself to God's care, and seek God's kingdom first and foremost.
Don't judge others, but instead first work on your own blindness.
Go to God with all your needs, knowing that God is a caring Father.
Do to others as you would have them do to you.
Don't be misled by religious talk--what counts is actually living by Jesus' teaching.
Jesus reinforces this last point—that he's looking for action, not just agreement—in the final words of the manifesto:
Everyone then who hears these words of mine and acts on them will be like a wise man who built his house on rock. The rain fell, the floods came, and the winds blew and beat on that house, but it did not fall, because it had been founded on rock. And everyone who hears these words of mine and does not act on them will be like a foolish man who built his house on sand. The rain fell, and the floods came, and the winds blew and beat against that house, and it fell—and great was its fall! (Matthew 7:24-27 NRSV)
Tuesday, July 07, 2009
Saint Francis

I am reading a book called "Heroic Lives," (by Rafael Sabatini, published in 1934) and one of the sections of the book is dedicated to St. Francis. I was climbing stairs today and reading, when one of my knees suddenly gave a painful twinge of warning. So I decided to go do some low-impact stretching instead, and to try to find a free computer somewhere in order to post several paragraphs from the book that really touched me. Here we go (from pgs 72 and 73):
"He was greeted first in his native Assisi with mockery and insult. Scorned as a madman, he was derided, pelted with filth, even beaten, all of which he bore as so many favours bestowed upon him.
"He preached a simple gospel of love that could be understood by all, and presently, before the inspired fervour of his words, supported by the example of humility, charity and self-denial which his life was become, mockery was gradually silenced, and the Assisians came in ever-increasing numbers to listen to his message. Passionately sincere in his please that men should give up ill-gotten gains, renounce all enmities and prevail by gentleness and love, he bewildered his audiences by no exegitical subtleties, propounded no doctrines. He spoke to them in their own simple language of simple things which they could understand and which were concerned with their own simple lives. He stripped Christianity naked of all theology in which it was swaddled, lost, and stifling, and held it up to them in its pure irresistable loveliness.
"Little by little, the people came to discover in his words that spiritual nourishment for which all men crave, but which there had been practically no one to dispense to them. He touched the hearts and awakened the souls of his audiences. A people brutalized by ignorance or corrupted by false culture, a people who knew not where to seek happiness save in the will-o'-the-wisp of pleasure, were made to realize the joys that may irradiate lives lived for others, the peace and tranquillity that may so be won."
(I find this excerpt so amazingly lovely, humbling, and inspiring, that I know I'll be reading and re-reading it for some time to come.)
(Photo from the Internet)
Monday, July 06, 2009
A Near-Death Experience
Saturday, June 20, 2009
Message to my blogging friends
I have been a terrible blogger lately, and I'm afraid it's not going to get any better in the foreseeable future. There are so many posts that I haven't been able to read, or comment on. And so many people have blessed me by leaving comments on my blog, and I haven't been able to reply to those either. I am so dreadfully sorry. I love you all and you're in my thoughts and prayers constantly. I pray everything is going well for you, and that you're healthy and happy.
Many blessings,
Mel
Sunday, June 14, 2009
Life Goes On, and Adventures in Reading
Recently I finished reading the book "The Unthinkable" and that same day I started reading the next book on my list "The Leader in Me" by Stephen Covey. It's so inspiring and thought-provoking, I'm having a hard time putting it down. In fact, my love for reading books has been recently rekindled, which is part of the reason I'm not posting as regularly as I used to. If you could see all of the sticky-notes that pepper the pages of the books I've read recently, you'd laugh. All of those sticky-notes represent quotes or paragraphs or excerpts that I would like to post on my blog, or explore in more detail. I have to laugh at myself. :)
Snapshots

While we were waiting for the band to be ready to play, Linnea wanted to show me something in her locker. She did not, however, want me to take any pictures of her messy locker. But I couldn't pass up posting this cute picture, because it captures Linnea's flare for the dramatic, and Rebecca's curiosity about "big girl" things. Like middle-school lockers.
Linnea took quilting as a class her last trimester this year, her 8th grade year. Here's a picture of her proudly holding up her lovely quilt for all to see.
A few days ago when I came home from work, my mom and the little ones, Michael and Rebecca, were anxiously waiting to show me their triumph for the day--a lovely tent made out of our swing set and several blankets, sheets and towels pinned or sewn together. It took quite a long time to build, and everyone enjoyed playing in it and resting in it, including our Pomeranian, Shiloh.
Wednesday, June 03, 2009
My Dad, and my Trip to St. Al's
Our Surprise Welcome Home
Saturday, May 30, 2009
"Above All Things I Believe in Love"
I’m telling you, the truth of God’s Kingdom is spread far and wide, and appears in the most unlikely of places… Look at this interchange from and early scene of the movie “Moulin Rouge”:
“Do you believe in freedom?”
“Yes.”
“Beauty?”
“Yes, of course!”
“Truth, love?”
“Love? Above all things I believe in love. Love is like oxygen.”
* * * *
Like I said… God’s message is everywhere, even in the most unlikely of places.
Thank God for Movies!
I'm in the middle of a massive project of filing away 6 months worth of paperwork. Previous to this, I took 2 months worth of cardboard to the recycling facility, which was also in itself a major project.The reason I say "Thank God for Movies" is because this particular movie is helping me get through this extremely tedious filing project. As I'm filing, I'm playing this movie (which I dearly love) on the DVD Drive in my PC. I took a break from filing to post this post because something in the movie spoke to me.
Near the beginning of the movie, there's a scene where the main character is filling in for an actor who has passed out. The main character begins to sing "The Hills are Alive" from the movie "The Sound of Music," and his skillful singing and the beautiful music serve to bring order out of chaos.
This spoke to me, because this is how God so many times brings order out of chaos in my life... Through music. I love the music in "Moulin Rouge" which is why I love the movie itself. There are many things I don't like about the movie, but what I love about it far overshadows those things. So I say again, "Thank God for Movies." :)
Sunday, May 24, 2009
Thank God for my Husband!
Anyone who's been reading this blog for any length of time knows how much I want to be able to take care of my home and yard, and how miserably I fail at being able to do that. Well, Keith was home on Thursday night, and I was, too, unexpectedly, because praise practice was cancelled. He made a long list of everything that needed to be done (vacuum, sweep and mop, clean the bathrooms, etc) and assigned a task or tasks to everyone in the house (except for my mom and the little kids).

Friday, May 22, 2009
It's Great to be Home!
Saturday, May 16, 2009
A Little Vacation
Thursday, May 14, 2009
Lunchtime Encounter with God
Yesterday at lunch I went to Lourdes Cathedral to pray. I never even realized it was there, just a few blocks from my work, until a few days ago. There is a service that takes place there at noon every day, and I was in the sanctuary while that noon-hour service was going on. I can’t even begin to describe how full my heart was—so full that it literally overflowed in tears of joy and awe and repentance. The room was full of quiet, profound reverence. The stained glass windows with the sun shining through them were beyond breathtaking. I don’t remember the last time I felt the presence of God so powerfully or so deeply. I can’t wait to go back! (This time it’ll be with a stash of Kleenex in my pocket…) These are a couple of photos I took while I was at the cathedral. They don't do the windows justice, though.
Our Beautiful Blue Planet
I downloaded Google Earth so I could follow the progress of certain freshwater well projects through Charity Water. It’s one of the most amazing feats of electronic achievement I’ve ever seen! My husband has been having a great time exploring with it, too. He even found our house. You can zoom in really close—close enough to see the cars in the driveway and the pool in the back yard. Talk about having the whole world at your fingertips! It’s a map-lover’s paradise! J(Phto From the Inernet)
Books, Books and More Books
Tuesday night I was blessed to be able to go to the Spokane Valley Library—twice! The first time I went it was just me and my mom, because I knew she needed to get out of the house for a bit. We found several delightful picture books to take home to read to the kids, as well as a couple of DVD’s, one of which was “War Photographer.” The second time I went, it was just me and Linnea, and together we ended up getting three bags full of books. To coin a phrase of Pastor Eric’s, “My reading eyes are bigger than my reading stomach.” For sure.I was nearing the end of the book “A Generous Orthodoxy” by Brian McLaren at that time, and wanted to check out some of the books that he references in it. One of the books I checked out is “Bury My Heart At Wounded Knee” by Dee Brown. It’s a non-fiction book about some portions of American history as told form a Native American perspective. I’m only about 4 pages into it, and I’ve been near tears a few times already. The atrocities that have been committed by people of my own race and religion (in God’s name, no less!!) absolutely take my breath away and cause my heart to physically hurt. My father-in-law, my mom’s boyfriend and one of my best friends from high school are both Native American, so this book is especially meaningful to me. May God use it to open my eyes and humble my heart.
(This photo is also from Katrena)

